SLEEPING WITH THE ENEMY

Its hard to make progress in any area of your life if the people in your own home is working against you. I have seen a few awesome relationships that really came across to me as a team working together as one to accomplish something. I have always admired these relationships from a distance. I was on the outside looking in but what I saw I liked and wanted the same. In my search for a mate I never asked the really important question, is this person someone that could help me fulfill my dreams and goals? Everytime I start to work on a project that was dear to my heart my mate would react so strangely. It is a shame that I was afraid to dream out loud in my own home. Instead of him looking at my business ideas as a way to take our family to another level it made him jealous and angry. I was sleeping with the enemy.

The verbal abuse was terrible. To live in a house where the person that you sleep with every night tell you that you are nothing and will never be nothing was a nightmare. Then he wanted me to go to bed at the same time he was in bed to keep me from working on my projects. Why did he want to cuddle with a nothing? How many nights did I go to sleep crying while he held me close to him. I couldn't even go to the restroom without him asking where I am going. No matter what I tried to do to better myself he would sabotage it in some kind of way. He was so controlling. I didn't even think of this as a form of domestic abuse.

I often wondered if the marriages that I admired from a distance were going through the same thing. Its a legitimate question because I paraded around my family and friends like nothing was wrong. As a matter of fact if they read my articles it would shock them to a certain degree. Even as I sit in church sometimes I look around and wonder how many of the women there are miserable in their relationship because of domestic violence and not saying anything about it to anyone. Soaking in God's word and then asking him over and over Lord Lord is this man the one for me if not show me, even though he has answered that prayer over and over again.

I was sleeping with the Enemy! YOU don't have to stay

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